Games Begin

Ready... set...

Passing "GO!"
+$200

...hey! I didn't say "GO" yet! Get back here!





CURRENT MUSIC:
Jun Ishikawa - "Dream Land Stage"
Nintendo All-Star! Dairanto Smash Brothers Original Soundtrack

This was probably my most favorite stage when I played Super Smash Bros. for the Nintendo 64. I mean, the stage was pretty much balanced in terms of layout; the music matched the chaos that this fighting game spewed out; the overall feel to the area just made the game what it was - and that was "awesome."

Anyway, after debating for about a half-hour over what I'd play on here, I settled on this because it's simple, fun, and hectic enough to instill some kind of "work ethic" feeling in me.

We need that - after all, I did say I'd put some good entries up this week, right?





So, to begin to make up for the lack of entries on here, I decided to slap some more pics on here. Granted, they're all for 1000 Blank White Cards (in case the tags up above didn't give it away), but they're all pretty funny. Besides, I'm sure I've inspired someone somewhere to start up their own game, and they're checking back here occasionally to compare their (friend's) psychosis with mine.

Well, let's not keep you waiting. Let's begin by slapping these pictures on the Internet!

28.8k
The person to your right must now imitate the sound of a dial-up modem.
+ one month free using America Online

I wasn't kidding. I needed to upload these photos somehow, and sadly this was the best method to do so. Anyway, this card was partly inspired by this Real Life comic. I know - 28.8k isn't the fastest that dial-up can go, but it's the speed that I first got to use the Internet at.

Ration
"Replenishes LIFE Gauge."
Keep "Ration" in front of you at all times.
If a card were to declare you "dead," discard "Ration" and gain 100 points instead.

Ah, the "Ration." The best friend of all Metal Gear players out there. Finding these on "Extreme" difficulty was nearly impossible, but it was so worth the numerous deaths.

Anyway, I figured that since I've included quite a few cards that inflict death, I might as well make a pseudo-counter for it. That, and I now have a card that directly references the Metal Gear saga! Two-fer!

Strong Mind, Strong Body
Perform ten push-ups.
As each push-up is performed, name off an element from the periodic table.
+10 per push-up/element

This game promotes physical strength as well as mental prowess. This card chewed both up and spat this out.

Dead Poets Society
All other players can only speak to you by first saying: "O Captain! My Captain!"
Each time a player forgets to do so, they must give you 100 points.

I already have a few cards that alter how players are to be referred to. Just imagine if they got jumbled up together. You'd be going something like, "O Captain! My Captain! Josh the Wolfslayer, you are awesome, good Sir!"

That'd be hard to keep track of. And that's the point. =P

Imaginary Victory
+∞i points

The most consistent rules in all the 1000 Blank White Cards games I've seen involve a "no auto win/lose" rule. Those are stupid. However, this isn't a technical victory, because let's face it - imaginary points won't get you to first place.

Stubbed Toe
FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUU
-30 and -2HP

We've all done this. It hurts like hell. And as for the hit points? What if someone modified the game so that every player had hit points? Could this alter how things go?

Chauvinism (SECRET)
If you're MALE: Brag about being the superior gender. (-200)
If you're FEMALE: Slap as many male players that you want. (+100 per slap)

This isn't just a game for guys. The ladies at work who've seen me work on this game have noted how insane and interesting this game is. (It's more readily apparent when you can see that devious glint in their eyes as they imagine their own cards.)

Of course, that's not to say that they think their cards are the only good ones. They love this card. I'm not quite sure why, though... *scratches head*

Haughty Art Critic
Cards with pictures of stick figures can no longer affect you.
-760 for being a pompous jerk

Since most people use simple stick figures as their card illustrations, why not take advantage of this fact? Initially, I had planned this card to be even more powerful than it is - it had originally stated that all cards played by all players would be nullified. That would just be dull.

Still though, this proves to be interesting.

FUCK THAT SHIT!
All other rules, restrictions, conditions, abilities, bans, and what have you are now NULLIFIED.
"FUCK THAT SHIT!" cannot be negated or interrupted.

Of course, even if I did make "Haughty Art Critic" completely overpowered, there's always the chance that someone will get a wildcard blank and make a counter for it. I made the counter anyway - and it's a near-ultimate one at that. Essentially, it resets everything but points and players' hands (if they're using hands), and cards that don't really modify anything (such as the "Ration" card up above).

It's a blessing and a curse - some people like having to do stupid stuff when they play a card or go on their turn...

Mad Hatterbot
Loudly exclaim the Mad Hatterbot's catchphrase: "CHANGE PLACES!"
Afterwards, all players must change places. Gameplay continues in the same direction, starting from the turn player.
+408

And to close things off, we have a Futurama reference (and one of my better-made cards, I must admit). This card speaks for itself.





Well, that's it for today, everyone. Until the 'morrow, and remember:

"CHANGE PLACES!"